Drive-thru car oil change along with soothing massage? Hey, a woman can dream

Why is it that when embarking on a long road trip, one of the last things I get done is an oil change in my vehicle? I’m quite aware of what date our vacation starts. I’m the one who books it. Alas, no matter how many days I have to prepare, I seem to run out of time.

The last vacation we took was to start on a Sunday after my daughter’s musical theater closing performance. I need to have a reminder on my calendar that says, “Do not plan summer vacations on the same day as a performance.” Yes, we’ve done this twice now and it clearly is a ridiculous plan.

It was a beautiful sunshiny Saturday, approximately 24 hours before our departure to drive to the mountains. My SUV’s temperature gauge read 93 degrees and my oil gauge was at 20%. Neither was ideal for traversing mountain terrain.

After dropping my daughter off for her matinee performance, I only had a one-hour window to get my vehicle serviced before I needed to be back at the theater to attend the show.

Since the theater was not far from my car dealership, I headed that way to find the entire service area filled with Saturday afternoon worker malaise. Note to self: Don’t return on a Saturday unless you want to be ignored again by six customer reps.

My next stop was to a national franchise for quick oil changes. In the past, I’d used this company several times and had no issues; but they confessed a 40-minute wait, and that wouldn’t include the time they would be working on it.

I had already wasted 12 minutes with the first two auto shops, so I said a little prayer and obeyed my GPS to my last hope. The speediest of the fast oil change chains was begging me to come closer.

As I pulled up to the building, a sign over one of the mechanic stalls read “Fast Oil Change.” Another sign claimed it was a “drive through, stay in your car” experience.

I pulled in aligned over what I assumed was some poor chap down in the oil pit and was greeted by a team of workers above ground, who were happy to help me on a scorching Saturday afternoon. The gentleman on my left asked me to turn off my engine and checked all my safety lights, while another man had me roll down the passenger window halfway, as he inserted what looked like a circular tube similar to the one on the back of your clothes dryer.

That nice man stated he was going to blow in some A/C while I waited in my hot car. I could feel the stress lessen from the earlier failed experiences.

The manager, Dwayne, then welcomed me and discussed my options. The dreaded air filter coercion was to begin. He raised my filter to my window and said, “This looks great. Hardly dirty!” Had I heard him right? He wasn’t trying to oversell me a filter. How refreshing.

After I made my choices, he walked away, and I actually leaned my seat back and enjoyed the AC and some tunes on the radio. It occurred to me that I was actually relaxed and smiling a bit. All I needed was some cucumber water and a mud mask to be transported to a tranquil spa experience.

Then my mind wandered to how to perfect my drive-thru experience. What if you could order a neck massage by a professional masseuse? They could offer different packages like a synthetic oil blend, paired with a relaxing jade hot stone neck massage. Or perhaps, a brake fluid exchange along with a luxurious skin-softening paraffin-wax hand treatment? The pairings are endless.

Dwayne returned and assured me that all was in working condition for my family road trip. He told me the drive-thru experience came about during the pandemic and that it could stay that way. All in all, the entire visit took under 15 minutes.

Thanks, Dwayne and the gang.

Stacey Hatton can be reached and fully relaxed at laughingwithkids@yahoo.com.