Sure, technically the country's truly largest house—the well-documented, high-drama 'Versailles' monster that smears across Windermere, Fla., at 90,000 square feet—has blipped onto the market a few times in the last few years, but the palace has been off the official listings since August 2012, likely because the owners are now trying to wrap construction before selling it off. (Interested parties, word is, can still pay $65M for the property as is.) With Versailles off the table, it seemed a fine idea to round up the nation's other largest estates on the market right now.
Of course, "largest house" is a somewhat nebulous term so, to clarify: this list only takes from single-family, actualized—though do keep an eye out for NYC's 62,000-square-foot The Residence at River House, TBD—listings in the United States found on Zillow. Now what counts as a "single-family?" Also nebulous. Let's put it this way: a huge manor with a couple of guest houses on the property? Sure, the total compound's interior square-footage is counted here. A property that's got a house plus four guest villas, three stocked lakes, two guest houses, and a 70,000-square-foot equestrian center? Yeah, that's not a house, that's a summer camp. Nice try, bub. Without further ado:
↑ Coming in at No. 12 is this foreclosed home in Boca Raton, Fla., a 32,511-square-foot single-family with 16 bedrooms and a list of lavish add-ons to make Caligula blush. Besides the basics, like "regally scaled" living areas, a resort-style pool, and absolutely essential 14-car garage, the place boasts a banquet-sized dining room, a hair salon, a billiards room, and a card room with stained glass ceilings. That and more for $6.95M.
↑ The brokerbabble for this "incredible masterpiece" in Potomac, Md., goes on about its 33,000 square feet of "unparalleled design," with more limestone, hand-made brick, and "custom milled" cherry and tiger wood than anybody could possibly want. The 10-bedroom mansion, developed by "renowned and premier" builder David Niroo, also boasts two elevators and a library straight out of Beauty and the Beast. The ask? $18M.
↑ The Blue Heron Estate in Barrington, Ill., features a Greek Revival style manse loping across 33,500 square feet. Inside: a pool, cherry wood wet bar(s?), porcelain floors, a 1,300-bottle wine cellar, and—count 'em—two master suites. All this, plus a stream, lake, fishing pond, and two-stall barn (with hay loft!), goes for $5,999,999. (Because that dollar under $6M makes all the difference.)
↑ Also in the great expanses of the Midwest sits Wisconsin's Ellison Bay Manor, a 35,000-square-foot estate perched on a bluff overlooking Lake Michigan. On offer: a two-story wood-paneled library (a requisite for behemoth real estate and—you know?—everybody's OK with that), a 5,000-square-foot master suite, a steam room, a garden room, and "multiple parlors" and "galleries." The property's three-bedroom guest home and beach house are also counted toward the interior square footage. This and more for $8.75M.
↑ Here's a place in Hillsborough, Calif., "for the buyer who wants everything." What is "everything," exactly? 35,000 square feet, for one, plus 12 bedrooms, 12 full baths, three kitchens, a library, and a pool + poolhouse. Built in 1930, the "KING'S DOMAIN" asks $23.888M.
↑ This 2008 estate in Atlanta, Ga., comes in at a nice even 40,000 square feet, with nine bedrooms, 15 bathrooms, a hair salon, two gyms, a "wellness center," and cigar room. It's listed for $19.9M.
↑ The most impressive tidbit about this home in Paradise Valley, Ariz., is not the imported marble, his/hers locker rooms, Olympic-sized pool, or 2,900-square-foot guest house—it's definitely the 23 bathrooms. You could bring an entire kindergarten class here and if they all need to go to the bathroom at once, it wouldn't matter. Now that's an amenity. The brokerbabble insists there's 52,000 square feet of living space, but a bit of further digging through property records reveals the $10M listing's true size: 40,280 square feet.
↑ Number five, located in Beverly Hills, has a familiar yarn to spin: the 11-bedroom estate on Lania Lane has been a regular feature of Curbed's expensive rental round-ups. It's $195K a month ask earned the place the No. 11 slot in this year's map. What's more, at 43,000 square feet, it's the country's largest rental.
↑ Measuring 45,143 square feet, Paradisio Del Mar in Lantana, Fla., is, if the brokerbabble is to be believed "one of the most unique Oceanfront and Intracoastal Estates in Florida." The luxe add-ons themselves seem fairly vague and run-of-the-mill—"gracious" living room, "elegant" dining room—and that's probably because with a house of that size, and a view that spectacular, juicy interiors descriptions are just not necessary. It's hoping for $32.5M.
↑ With 47,000 square feet, this pink castle (let's talk about that turret) in Cartersville, Ga.. comes with a main estate as well as a three-bedroom guest house, a three-bedroom "caretaker residence," and stables. There's also 14 fireplaces, three kitchens, and a two-story library "designed for the owner, a multi-best selling author." (A quick Google search indicates that the property belongs to bestselling crime fiction writer Iris Johansen.) The place asks $8.5M.
↑ This 11-bedroom Colorado estate takes home the silver, with 50,397 square feet of shiny taupe interiors. Included in the $14.9M ask: 24 bathrooms, a 16-car garage, 10 fireplaces, and panoramic sunset and sunrise mountain views. It's also the only mansion on this list that was on the similar round-up Curbed did last year.
↑ The largest house on the market right very now is—surprise!—Michael Jordan's "grown up playground" in Highland Park, Ill., which measures 56,000 square feet when including his regulation-sized basketball court. He first listed the property for $29M in early 2012, only to PriceChop it by $8M by January 2013. After a failed auction just before Christmas, Jordan regrouped and relisted the place, and is now asking just $16M. Hopefully that Today Show marketing blitz will do the trick this time.