Yahoo Finance Bachelorette Michelle Young Calls Out Jamie Skaar During Men Tell All Special: 'Words Do Matter'
This post contains spoilers from Monday's episode of The Bachelorette.
Bachelorette Michelle Young didn't hold back during her season's Men Tell All special.
During Monday's episode, the 28-year-old Minnesota native reunited with 15 men who previously competed for her heart. And while some of her interactions with the group went smoothly, her conversation with Jamie Skaar was intense.
Michelle spoke with Jamie, 32, about how he called her out for the way she balanced her various relationships with the other contestants. He accused Michelle of being on "spring break mode" in an episode that aired on Nov. 2.
Jamie praised the season 18 lead on Tuesday for being "authentic" and "fabulous across the board," though Michelle questioned his inability to lift her up at all times.
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"As I watch back and I see those things that you have said on-camera about me going through a 'spring break mode,' you expressed that the men in the house were below you. And for me, that's not what a coach does," she said.
"That doesn't embody anything that a coach does. And so, I don't understand how you can be so comfortable or quick to express and preach positivity when that's not what you're showcasing 100 percent of the time. And that's where I have a problem is because I'm not seeing any responsibility," Michelle said.
Jamie then apologized to "anybody" who "felt hurt" by his words, but Michelle quickly rejected that sentiment. He then went on to defend his actions.
"Part of going through and figuring out how we feel about things is that we have to vent it too. Like, you have to get it out," he said. "I was in an emotional extreme of feeling like I need to get out of here, and those were the words that I expressed to justify feeling like I wanted to get out. And I took a lot of care while we were on the show to not talk about anybody in a negative manner."
John Fleenor/ABC
Michelle pointed out that Jamie only held up that philosophy to people's faces, though Jamie disagreed. "That's not even accurate though," he continued. "It was literally that one clip. ... And I'm saying that that moment was more about me than it was about me going through and expressing my genuine opinion about everybody there. That was never the reason or intention for me to come here."
Then, Michelle said "words do matter," adding that she doesn't believe Jamie has "learned from it." Jamie doubled down on his sentient, however.
From there, Michelle chose to close out the conversation by saying: "I think that it's very clear it is frustrating to sit here and truly not feel that you have learned from those comments and those things that you have said."
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"[You're] apologizing because you have to if somebody feels hurt. You're putting it on them as like they're at fault for what you said," she continued. "I believe in being respectful at all times, whether that's in your friendships, whether that's to your family members, whether that's in your intimate relationships. A relationship is never going to survive if you base it on having to do that and just always having to backtrack, because words do hurt and respect is a huge thing. And I choose to either be by myself or be with somebody who respects me, even when they are upset with me or whatever is going on in the world."
Concluding her point, Michelle added: "And for that, I think it's very clear of why this relationship didn't work out."
Jamie tried to apologize once more to Michelle and the other men.
"I apologize for what I said. You felt disrespected by it. You men felt disrespected by it. Those words did come out of my mouth," he said. "[Michelle], thank you for sharing how you were feeling for me to be able to get that perspective. I was in the wrong and I apologize for that."
Sami Drasin/ABC via Getty; Craig Sjodin/ABC via Getty
Jamie wasn't the only guy Michelle had choice words for. At one point, Martin Gelbspan apologized to the grade school teacher for how things ended between them. But Michelle questioned the harsh words Martin previously relayed to her.
"As you left, you talked about how someone like me didn't deserve to be with someone like you," she recalled. "And my thing to you with that is why did you feel that it was okay to belittle me?"
Martin admitted he doesn't always express himself properly, leading him to apologize once more.
"But thanks to this whole process, I did find my soulmate and I do treat her very much like a queen," he said. "You helped me a lot through that process."
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John Fleenor/ABC
To that point, Michelle stressed the importance of lifting women up. "We are not lifted up and you have to truly understand what that means to treat a woman like a queen," she said.
"It's listening to her when she's vulnerable and embracing what she's been through instead of calling her immature and pointing at trauma being immature," she said. "Those words really do hit deep not only for me but so many other women."
Michelle and Martin then called a truce. "That's why I'm here as a man apologizing for what I said in that very moment. Not saying that's okay, I'm just apologizing for it," Martin said as Michelle added, "I do accept the apology, so thank you."
Michelle is now down to her final three suitors: Brandon Jones, Nayte Olukoya and Joe Coleman.
The Bachelorette airs Tuesdays (8 p.m. ET) on ABC.
