The quietest, most vicious kind of workplace bullying

We can thank Walt Disney and his cabal of adorable cartoon characters for instilling in us one of the primary tenents by which many of us continue to live today. Call it the Thumperian Principle: If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all.”
You remember how it goes.

But according to a new workplace study out of the University of British Columbia's Sauder School of Business, the advice from the Disney briar patch may be causing more harm than good. Turns out, being ignored at work is worse for our physical and mental well-being than verbal abuse, intimidation, humiliation and even sabotage.

People who say they have experienced ostracism in the office are significantly more likely to report a degraded sense of workplace belonging and commitment, a stronger intention to quit their job, and a larger proportion of health problems, the study found. At the same time, managers and staff at the 90 Canadian companies surveyed told researchers that they felt ostracizing behaviour was more acceptable – even professional -- than other forms of bullying.

The results make more sense than might first appear, said Sauder professor Sandra Robinson, an expert in workplace psychology and co-author of the bullying study. “We've been taught that ignoring someone is socially preferable (to other bullying behaviours),” she told Yahoo Canada Finance. “But we are social animals. We are hard wired to be connected to people, so ostracism feels more threatening than negative threatening. It's like a social death.”

Robinson said researchers, including those at the University of Toronto, decided to dig deeper into the little known topic of ostracism in the workplace after hearing from countless people during interviews, and even cocktail parties, how pervasive the problem appears to be.

Unlike other forms of bullying, which tends to be more obvious, ignoring or freezing someone out at the office goes largely unreported and unnoticed by everyone but the target of bad behaviour. It doesn't typically show up as someone being shunned by an entire organization. It's often more subtle, involving one person or a small group of people, and it's difficult to report because it is an absence of action, rather than something concrete.

One person told researchers she was the target of ostracism when she took on a new position at work and was rejected by the established “clique.” “No one asks for my opinion. No one thinks to include me in meetings. Half the time, I'm not even included on emails I should be included on,” the person reported. Another said colleagues act like she is invisible. “Whenever I would walk in the room, they would shut up but just as soon as I left they would start talking again," she said. In a third example, the subject said co-workers regularly go out for coffee or lunch but never ask him. “They say they keep forgetting because I work in the basement, but I'm not buying it," he said.

Sound uncomfortably familiar? You're not alone. Certainly, said Robinson, “our data shows that it is not uncommon for a large portion of the population to have had this experience at some point in their working lives.”

Though ostracizing behaviours have slipped largely under the radar, other forms of workplace bullying have been well studied across the globe. It's widely accepted that high-anxiety situations caused by bullying can have a significant drag on a company`s productivity as bullied employees can be distracted from the tasks at hand and lose motivation.

Research in the United Kingdom suggests bullying has been a factor in the loss of nearly 20 million working days each year. It's also a key factor influencing employee turnover rates.

Carey McBeth, a Vancouver-based workplace etiquette instructor, said any form of bullying, subtle or obvious, is unprofessional and encouraged companies to put together clearly worded policy of “zero tolerance” to manage unwelcome behaviours.
She said employees can help protect themselves from troubling situations by maintaining a state of total professionalism, and not giving bullies any ammunition to use against you.
“That means don't ever be late. Make sure, if your coffee break is 15 minutes, that you`re back in 13 minutes,” she said.

That doesn't mean you can't showcase a little warmth and caring. McBeth encourages workers to take a sincere interest in the lives of their colleagues, but warns against crossing the line into office gossip or idle chatter. “You have to remember this is a work environment,” she said.

Robinson said, while many companies have anti-bullying policy in place, most have yet to acknowledge ostracism as a behaviour to watch out for. In a secondary study on the topic, researchers are hoping to get to the bottom of what sparks ostracizing behaviour in the workplace and who tends to be its target.